Monthly Archives: April 2016

Up/Down

Standard

This week I’m feeling really down because of my upcoming mediation appointment (tomorrow). I feel like it isn’t going to turn out the way it needs to in order for Victoria to be comfortable, I can only have faith. Due to the fact that I’m feeling down and out of luck, I’ve decided to base this on everything I’m thankful for and everything that makes me happy. I need to counter this negativity with positivity, because despite all of the negative aspects of my life…There are far more positive qualities that I feel I should remind myself of.

  1. I suppose we should start with the obvious, I’m living. Well…I’m alive anyway.
  2. I have a family that semi-supports me.
  3. I have a daughter that is absolutely amazing. Intelligent, gorgeous beyond belief, hilarious, and she sets me straight. I love her to pieces and I am loving every second I spend with her. Watching her learn, her excitement when I say “time for math”, her eagerness to get it right the FIRST TIME or she has a total melt down (we’re working on that part). How much she loves me unconditionally and expresses it day to day, she even calls me her best friend. Now that’s a big deal. I know that no matter what happens tomorrow, she will love me and she will never forget everything I have done and will continue to do for her. She’s the coolest kid ever by the way. #sofashion
  4. Michael. My Michael. The man I thought I’d never meet, much less the man I thought I could never deserve. But I do. I deserve him. He is so selflessly there for me (even if he is my white cat…Inside joke). We share so much together. We can talk for hours and hours about everything and anything; we know so much about each other we ROCK at the Newlywed game LOL we’re not even Newlyweds but the game was forced on us. He is the only person in the whole wide world I can open myself up to, completely. He’s my down low partner in nerd crime. He loves me. He loves my daughter. He loves his children. He protects us and shows us what a man should really be like. He restored my faith in men, and made me a little less scared of the future, especially when Victoria starts dating. Every time I look at this man, it’s like I’m looking at him for the first time. He’s beautiful inside and out. I fall in love with him all over again, every day.
  5. I have a job. They hate me, but hey it’s there.
  6. I have friends who support me, put me in my place, and give me advice. You know who you are, I love you!
  7. I’m so so blonde right now, my hairdresser rocks.
  8. I have a networking team that is amazing, they’ve helped me with this process as well by giving me advice and pointing me in the right direction should I need a good lawyer.
  9. My sense of humor. My God have I needed a good sense of humor to deal with this shit.
  10. I’m not homeless.
  11. I can walk around and stuff, I mean I’m fat so it isn’t very fast, but I get there.
  12. Make up on point at least 85% of the time, which is pretty good if you ask me.
  13. I have a bright future ahead of me, and I know it.
  14. I have all of you who take the time out of your day to read my blogs, even if it’s just to snoop. Oh honey, you know who you are.
  15. I’m left handed meaning I’m smarter than most of you so BAM! Okay, that isn’t true. Being left handed is also extremely inconvenient in most cases.