Serving our country town by town, doing what’s right, helping communities run as smoothly as possible, that’s what they’re here for right? Right. I was talking to one. I am in no way, shape or form a badge bunny. The fact that he was a cop wasn’t what turned me on, it was the fact that he was incredibly rugged. Actually, he was kind of an ass but so was I so it worked…For a while anyway. He was sweet with his words but dry with his actions, he kept me on this string that I couldn’t cut away. I don’t know what the hell was wrong with me! It was like Brazilian voodoo. Nothing was physical about our relationship, all we ever did was talk and talk. He called me throughout the day, he text me, he always asked what I was doing.
Actually, now that I think about it, he was really controlling. If I didn’t answer the phone, text him back right away, or give him my absolute, undivided attention, he’d actually argue with me about it. If I explained that I was with my daughter, he’d complain further as if I’d give my time up with my daughter to talk to him. Dummy. He lived about 6 hours away from me and he didn’t mind coming up to visit as many times as he needed to, but that made me uncomfortable. I don’t care what anyone says, long distance relationships are just not for me. But…But….He was tall…And El Salvadorean…And handsome….And built just the way I like ’em….And he had great hair…And he’d probably be able to toss me around like a rag doll and spank me. Despite all of these things, he was still a friggin’ jerk. I was utterly disappointed.
We argued constantly, There was no such thing as a honeymoon stage for us and his reasoning was that he didn’t like to sugarcoat things, especially in the beginning so that he didn’t turn out to be a liar. He didn’t want everything to seem perfect at first and then blow up in our faces because we were both trying to impress each other the entire time. Pretty logical right? Sure, but why be a douche? It was the strangest thing, his actions didn’t match his words. He would say really sweet things to me but then he’d turn around and ignore me all day and not text me until the evening. Then once he did text me, he’d become upset if I didn’t have time to text him back right away.
Then he’d talk about how he couldn’t wait to have me move out there. What…The…Fuck did I just hear? I tried to explain to him that first of all, I would never tear my daughter away from my family. Second of all, we JUST started talking and ultimately I DO NOT CHASE MEN AROUND. He had no regard for my daughter whatsoever! He never asked about her, he grew bored when I talked about her, and he’d almost scoff when I’d hang up to be with my daughter. I don’t know why I wasted so much time on this guy, he was completely ridiculous. LUDICROUS!
I finally explained to him that I was wasting my time on someone who was the way he was and you know what he did? He turned it around and blamed it all on me. He was manipulative, aggressive (not the good kind) and completely out of line. He liked to throw his badge around and act like he was better than others because of it, even at work. He’d talk about the arguments he’d have at work and why he got so upset, it was all completely irrational. Everything was about him, at all times. If I had a bad day it was “Oh, well it happens to all of us”. If something horrible happened to me it was “Oh don’t be a cry baby”. Of course this was all towards the end of our extremely short “relationship”, “friendship” ,”courtship”, whatever the hell you want to call it. He made me feel small and insignificant and I tried my hardest to do the same back, which worked. At the end of the day he didn’t care and I didn’t either so we stopped talking.
It was extremely poisonous.