“What are you passionate about?”
“Ummm I don’t know, the things I’ve bought for myself I guess. Like my motorcycles and stuff. Oh and family”
“So umm…What do you have planned for today?”
And this is how each conversation went, everyday, for a month.
We’ll call him Chad since he had such a “Chad” type of personality. Remember the guy in Dating Chronicles Part 6 that I ended up liking over the actual subject of that blog? The one that decided he didn’t like ME making Karma my ultimate asshole redheaded stepbrother. Yeah, this is him. Chad was short, Portuguese, semi-handsome and had his shit together. The fact that he had his shit together was impressive since no one else seems to…Not even myself. He was really nice and was very careful not to ever hurt anyone’s feelings, which isn’t always a good thing. We talked for about a month, met a handful of times, mostly because I initiated the meeting. I tried to give him opportunities to see each other that he never took and our conversations were always so dull and short. He never asked me questions, never offered up information…Just nothing. One day he actually asked me if I’d like to make dinner together and watch a movie. I thought that was extremely sweet and I knew it’d be fun. Honestly, we did have a lot of fun only I kept having to pull for conversation. He always highlighted that he’s a laid back person and doesn’t talk much so I thought, you know, he’d open up eventually so I figured I’d be patient. At the end of the night he gave me a hug and a kiss on the forehead.
That was it.
No funny business, no trying to get anything he knew he wouldn’t get, none of that. I absolutely adored it and respected him for that. I thought, this is the kind of person I could be around long term. He was family oriented, sweet, and even tempered. It contrasted my asshole-ness perfectly. One morning, he asked me what I was up to and I let him know that I was just hanging around since Victoria wouldn’t be home until later that day. He invited me over to breakfast at his house…While his entire family was there. I declined to do so since it was just too weird, however, I did let him know I could swing by after. When I stopped by two of his seven siblings were still there and I really hit it off with them. Super nice people, they seemed to like me, things were just fine. One of his sister’s works at my favorite local Starbucks and she had been hounding him about going out with me more and talking to me more because she just absolutely looooooved me even though I had no idea who she was, she sure remembered me. That could mean ANYTHING I’m so talkative.
One day, I invited him over to chat a bit before he had to go to this family function. I warned him that I live a very simple life, I have a small apartment, lightly decorated, and not at all what most Portuguese households look like. He just laughed and said it was fine until he finally came into my apartment and said “Wow this IS tiny!!”. Even though it made me feel inadequate, I laughed it off. He commented on how my apartment fits inside of his living room alone and went on and on until I finally just changed the conversation.
That’s when I realized how shallow and materialistic he was. He made me feel so small and unworthy. Why did I like this man as much as I did? He was self absorbed, boring and so superficial. There was no depth, no way of feeding my mind. He wasn’t romantic. He never complimented anyone. He never supported any accomplishment. He always said “I don’t have the patience for romance anymore”. I have no idea why I liked this man!
Suddenly, I didn’t hear from him for a few days. As any adult would, I called him out and asked if he was going to tell me to my face that he wasn’t interested in me or should I just assume he was thrown into a sea of molten lava by earth walking mer-people.
This is what I got:
“You’re right, I should have said something sooner and I’m sorry. You’re a really nice girl (elch), you’re pretty, you’re a great mom and a great person. You’re really cool to be around and overall you’re just awesome. I just thought I was going to fall for you right away and I didn’t. I’m sorry I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings. I figured we could at least be friends”
“Chad, this isn’t a fairy tale. People don’t just fall in love at first sight, you didn’t even try to get to know me. I have friends up to my ears, I don’t need friends. You can’t hurt my feelings I’m the devil.”
“Haha yeah maybe you’re right”
“Well I really hope you find that right person (so dramatic haha sorry). When you do, you need to do me a favor and actually try with her.”
“Yeah okay lol”
Asshole. Asshole. Asshole.
Eh….I deserved it. NEXT