Monthly Archives: February 2015

Dating Chronicles Part 6 – The Clinger

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We’ve all been through this, heck at one point, we’ve even wished we had it.

The Clinger.

We met online and he seemed just fine; he was funny, sweet, compassionate, nerdy, and he had a darling little girl. We text all day long and I mean all day long. I thought it was cute at first, all the texting, then I realized how excessive it was. If I didn’t respond right away he’d send another, then another, then another. I’m about to sound like one of those women who doesn’t know what the hell she wants, and sometimes I really don’t know what I want. I just know there needs to be a balance. He was too nice, eerily so. Compliments all day long, texting all day long, just niceness all day long.

So we met.

He was cute in a dorky way, not really my type, but he was nice. We talked for hours and I had no idea where the time had gone. I liked spending time with him but I didn’t feel anything towards him romantically. We continued to text but never saw each other again, mostly because I didn’t put forth the effort to see him. Which is because I’m a total bitch, but I really didn’t mean to be, I just didn’t want to invest so much time in someone I wasn’t all that interested in. Weeks went by with the texting and I would text him less. Finally one day I just laid it out there, let him know that I didn’t know what it was exactly, but I just couldn’t see him in a romantic way. He was hurt and upset which I didn’t understand since we had only hung out once, but that brings it back to him just being a nice guy. And sensitive. Really sensitive. He also had soft looking hands which always bothers me.

I also think the fact that he agreed with everything I said bothered me. Or the fact that I would post a picture of waffles and suddenly he would text me and be like good morning I just had waffles. Uhhhhh…? Strange occurrences like that one led me to believe that a lot of his personality was fake. I always felt he was lying about something or not being completely truthful about certain things. Overall, really strange. I ended up meeting someone I was actually romantically interested in and I wanted to invest my time in that one person, I think that’s what pushed my action to just cut off any thoughts of a relationship with this person. He sent me a text saying that things wouldn’t be the same, he wouldn’t text me as often, he would merely “like” my Facebook statuses and look at my Snapchat. This made me laugh, it was completely juvenile but I said “okay” and kept it short. A day later, guess who’s power texting me again? Guess who’s trying to pursue something that isn’t there, again? Yes sir! You guessed it correctly! I kept my responses extremely short, if I responded at all. Finally he sent me a text saying, I can’t do this, this isn’t a friendship. I just said “ok” again and we never spoke again.

Thank.

God.

Am I being petty? Maybe. I just think everyone should be honest at all times.

Wana know the worst part? The one guy I was romantically interested in, in years, is no longer interested in me.

Aint that a bitch?

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Dating Chronicles Part 5 – Just Say It

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Women and men alike loooooove to play the game. If you’ve ever been a single adult, you know exactly what this game is. In fact, if you’ve ever been single in general you know what game this is. Teenagers, adults, and even some seniors play this game. It’s the game where you can’t just tell someone you like them, oh no, you have to make them guess. Keep it cool. Limit your texting to twice a day at the very most. Keep them short, don’t text paragraphs, don’t reply right away, wait at least 24 hours after your date to text, don’t be too eager to see each other (at least not out loud), keep your compliments down to one every few days, sure tell me about yourself but let’s keep it light, no dark information. Oh we have mutual friends? Let me find out all there is to know about you first, and if I don’t like what I hear, I’ll move on. No need to retrieve anything from the source. Keep the other people you talk to a secret, after all, what feelings?

I. Do. Not. Play. This. Game. 

Grow up. That’s it. Grow up. It’s easy. Be honest not only to yourself but to others. If you like someone, say it. If you want to spend time with them, say it. If you have other people you’re interested in, say it. If you go on dates, say it. If you feel like texting or calling, do it. I don’t know why people feel the need to impress each other so much. No one (but that one dumbass friend) will call you whooped or a sissy for expressing yourself to someone else. Men lately are used to women who chase and women lately are used to throwing themselves at men in all the wrong ways. Then there are others who want to play “hard to get” and then get upset when that person has given up on them. Don’t play period. All of these words being thrown out there are just made to make you feel self conscious. Thirsty. Whooped. Side bitches. It’s all wrong and childish.

Live. Feel. Love. Laugh. Hug. Be Yourself.

It’s okay if you’re dorky, if you have a weird laugh, if you have a strange obsession with Harry Potter or if you’ve been through some shit. It’s OKAY. If someone can’t accept your quirks then why waste time on them? If they’re too “cool” for you then let them be “cool” all by themselves. Chances are they’re not ready for you and/or they don’t deserve you.

It’s okay to tell someone you’re not interested instead of just blocking their number and falling off the face of the Earth. Just say it. I’m sorry, I’m no longer interested. A little bit of constructive criticism never killed anyone.

I know, it’s hard to do these things because we’ve all been hurt, but there’s your problem right there. Treat every new friendship/relationship as if it’s a new relationship, because that’s what it is, new. Do not suffer continuously because of what happened to you in the past. You’re the only one who’s losing. On the other hand, why is it so difficult for people to just be friends? Why is it all or nothing for some people? Or why do they expect a sexual relationship if nothing else? Women and men don’t know how to JUST be friends. You horny freaks. If that’s all you’re looking for, then just say it. Who knows, that other person might want the same type of relationship.

Stop wasting each other’s time.

Just say it.